Self love is important,
“Love yourself.” It’s a saying we hear all the time these days—from TV shows, social media, influencers, and books. But what does it really mean to love yourself? What does it look like? How do you make self-love a part of your everyday life?
The best way to truly love yourself is to treat yourself like you would your best friend. When it comes to our closest friends, we only see the positive in them. We don’t criticize them or point out their flaws. Instead, we offer them an ear to listen and a hug on standby for the hard days. We help our best friend feel empowered, encourage them when they need it, and cheer when they succeed.
But we rarely treat ourselves this way! We’re often hyper-critical of every mistake we make, making it easy for our fears and insecurities to distort our self-image. If we treated ourselves more like our best friends, we’d feel stronger, more empowered, and more able to love ourselves.
Are you interested to see how other women like you are treating themselves with self love on the daily ? Click here to join our VIP FACEBOOK GROUP
Here are five guaranteed ways to treat yourself like your best friend!
1. Forgive yourself.
How many times have you laid awake at night, thinking about a slip-up at work or a poorly thought out remark made to a friend or family member? We run our mistakes through our minds over and over again, punishing ourselves until we feel like we can’t do anything right.
If left unchecked, I know I can sometimes obsess over the same little mistake for days to weeks on end! Sometimes there wasn’t even a mistake! Sometimes I wonder “what if” and that is enough to send my thoughts spiraling in self doubt and anxiety!
It’s important to accept blame for the things we’ve done wrong, but being quick to do so often causes us to be overly hard on ourselves—and to take the blame for things that aren’t our responsibility.
However: do you ever notice when your best friend screws up and apologizes, you’re ready to give her a second chance? Show the same kindness and understanding to yourself.
You can’t go out and do great things if you drag every slip up with you along the way. Remember that one mistake doesn’t erase all the good things you’ve done or any of your fantastic qualities. Forgive yourself and allow yourself to move on.
2. Listen to—and tend to—your own needs.
When your best friend is up late preparing for an exam or work presentation, you’re there for all her needs. You make sure she doesn’t forget to eat, drink water, take breaks, and get that important beauty sleep. You make sure she doesn’t drink too much when you go out (or drinks just enough to let loose a little!) and offer her advice when she needs it.
Your own body and mind let you know what you need to stay healthy. Listen to them. Too often, we push ourselves too hard, trying to get everything crossed off our to-do list. But sometimes you need to slow down, for both your physical and mental health. Caring for yourself is a great way to show self-love, just as you do by caring for your loved ones.
Whether you work hard to reach your goals or rush to get your to-do list done, you’ll perform a lot better if you care for yourself like you would your best friend.
3. Surround yourself with people who love and respect you.
The people we let in our lives have a huge impact on how we see ourselves and our circumstances. For example, spending all your time with people who don’t respect you makes it harder to respect yourself. Surrounding yourself with negative people makes life a lot harder and a lot less enjoyable.
If your best friend’s relationships were hurtful, you’d tell her to drop those friends, that toxic ex, or her unsupportive job because she deserves better! But when it comes to yourself, it’s easy to think you deserve what you’re given or that settling isn’t so bad.
Instead, try to make sure your life is full of people who genuinely care about you. You’ll be amazed at how much better you’ll feel when you trade out negativity for a more supportive network! When you’re well-loved by others, it’s easier to see how deserving you are of that love and self-love.
4. Stand up for yourself.
You wouldn’t allow anyone to tell your best friend she’s unattractive or terrible at her job. If someone insults your best friend, you’d be quick to come to her defense or even throw hands if necessary! So, why would you allow someone to say those things or speak that way to you?
I will never forget when a client of mine burst into tears when I showed her a picture of herself on the back of my camera. The woman she saw looked nothing like all the mean, nasty things she thought about herself after years of battling low self esteem. When she saw her picture, every insecurity and fear she had was exposed for the lies that they were. She stood up for herself by taking a chance on her boudoir session and, as a result, she saw herself for who she is: beautiful, strong, and worthy.
Unfortunately, the meanest person in your life is sometimes yourself! This means that, just like how you’d stick up for your friend, you have to stand up and remind yourself of your own worth and value. It can be a challenge to learn to stick up for yourself, but it’s well worth it.
5. Treat yourself.
Some of the kindest things our best friends do for us are unexpected surprises: bringing you your favorite drink on a bad day or inviting you out for a spontaneous lunch date.
Show yourself that same love with an occasional treat! Sometimes you need that latte or a nice massage to make a rough day a little better. They say gift giving is one of the five love languages so don’t be afraid to splurge on yourself every once in awhile! Remind yourself that you are worthwhile and deserve good things and great experiences during your lifetime.
See yourself through your best friends eyes. Your best friend is your best friend for a reason! They wouldn’t be here if they didn’t love everything about you and you wouldn’t stick around if you didn’t love them just the same. If you learn to show yourself the same care and kindness you show your best friend, then you can truly learn how to love yourself.
Interested in maybe treating yourself with a boudoir session? Click Here to Read our post about what lingerie is the best lingerie to wear to your session!